Told you once and I told you twice
Why be mean when you can be nice?
Come on, be kind to me!
Can't you see I'm in misery?

I hardly feel like a mustard seed
'cause your love is all I need
Come on, be kind to me!
Can't you see I'm in misery?

I'm the ace of hearts and she's my queen
The best old girl you ever seen
Come on, be kind to me!
Can't you see I'm in misery?

I told you, child, when you were sixteen
I wanted you, girl, to be my queen
Come on, be kind to me!
Can't you see I'm in misery?

I'm a bull frog sitting on a lily pond
I was holding her in my arms
Come on, be kind to me!
Can't you see I'm in misery?

I call you on the telephone
Tell me why you're never home
Come on, be kind to me!
Can't you see I'm in misery?
Oh, can't you see I'm in misery?